The serious business of sex allegations

I have decided to tackle something that is trending, the fact that this subject is trending actually makes me feel sick. That subject is the new spate of sexual assault allegations, especially regarding celebrities and those in the public eye, for instance politicians. No doubt some of what I say is going to spark anger and backlash, but please believe me that this is not my intention and this piece is written from the heart. I have also been there and I have to say that my way of dealing with this was probably not the healthiest, however everyone has to deal with their own lives in their own ways, as long as their actions do not hurt others. My way of dealing with bad things is to bury them deep in the recess of my mind.

My main concern is for the victims of course, be they male, or female. The other concern that I have is the generation that we seem to live in these days and the kneejerk reactions that this generation has. A culture of trial by media and social media, prior to the courts. Guilty until proven innocent.

It always seems that these things come in waves, people seem to come forward and keep coming forward. This automatically makes people wary; and yet convinced that this must be true as there are so many affected. My issue though is; is this a wave built on bravery and being influenced by the courage of others coming forward and motivating people to be no longer silent. Or is there something more sinister underlying this. Some people have allegedly, already received pay-outs to silence them. I for one, could never accept what I would call blood money from some scum who had done something to me. Justice and karma are the way forward. So I would hate to think that maybe some people would also use this serious and awful crime, to boost their profile.

I think that these days we live in a culture of “sheep syndrome”, where people tend to follow the crowd to merely be part of the crowd. We are surrounded by keyboard warriors, not scared to put in their meanings and opinions, no matter how hurtful to others, (I know that you are probably thinking “Like you, you mean. A fine one to talk”). Not scared to troll people, who could be genuinely in their hour of need.

You see my concern is that some of these accused people are not guilty and that they are already judged. I am in no way defending the actions of a rapist, molester, etc. In my opinion, everyone needs a fair trial and these days they are few and far between. People’s minds are made up as soon as they read the latest tabloid. I mean it is in print, it must be true. They have decided when they see the latest hashtag on Twitter. What can be damaging is that these days people come forward in such a way it brings into question the credibility of the case. Also once the mud is thrown, whether in the end these people are proven innocent, that mud sticks.

It makes me think of the lyrics from The Stereophonics it;

“Only takes one tree to make a thousand matches
Only takes one match to burn a thousand trees”

My concern is; if this is actually working in an opposite and detrimental way to those who are just ”normal” folk suffering. If this way of outing people and judging them on the say so, is undermining real everyday cases. Some people can afford the expensive legal representation, they are supported by the press and all those around them, for who they are.

Spare a thought for your neighbour, the one who is too scared to leave the house, for fear someone will see her bruises and the years of abuse she has endured. She is scared her kids will be hurt, so she feels she has to stay. Spare a thought for the man, who is too ashamed to admit his partner hits him and mentally abuses him. Think about the girl at the bar targeted for her clothing, who has to live with that 1 decision for the rest of her life.