Friends and social media

Facebook amazes me. The power it has, the tragedy it spreads and the hope it gives. Obviously this is with all social media I think, but I am neither cool enough, or can be arsed to have anything else so Facebook it is. I lie I once had Twitter and by default still do I mean how the hell do you delete it?  ( I have a confession I now have Twitter again for this blog! See this blog writing malarky isn’t so easy. ) I also once had the one you like photos, or posts, or you pin stuff, what is it called man!? Pinterest, that is it and what a waste of several minutes of my life that was. I still have no understanding of the point of it.

I love it you know when you see one of those vague, attention seeking statuses Molly is feeling down… FUCK MY LIFE!!!  You just sit back and watch them all crawl out of their holes to pry, just for gossip. Honestly try it, people you haven’t spoken to in years will be all Ah hun, you ok? / Inbox me if you need me / Is there anything I can do and so on. Literally like when you think you want a shit and then all of a sudden it is just there, they will flock.

This leads me onto how the hell and why the hell are people friends on Facebook.  I mean come on who the hell as 1057 friends in real life?!? Really Sue, who’s leg are you pulling. Liking the posts of some waiter you have stalked since you were 17, on your first girls holiday coz he was fit, really? Just because you gave a girl in the toilets some bog roll when she was crying on a night out and then walked her to get a greasy kebab, come on.

I feel sorry for the younger generation, it will take them way longer to realise that you need real friends and not just a load of FBA (Friends by association). Or even worse FBSM (Friends by social media) Ah isn’t she fit, I will inbox her with the very lines I have used on all the others. You look nice, want to chat?/ Do I know you? / How can someone as fit as you be single? (for the real stalky creeps)

Like what are friends these days, just people to make our ridiculous duck-faced selfies look popular as well as our walls, or are they the people who hold your hair back when you’re puking and remind you what a dick you were last night?